8/4/08

I have absolutely no one that I can talk to about everything that is making me feel like I'm being crushed. It all effects anyone I could talk to in some way or the people are having equally as trying times.

As of now I am financially fucked, which is making me emotionally fucked. Work is definitely not helping. I'm in over my head, with my hands tied, and everyone is asking me why I can't swim over and over and over. Its almost to the point where I can't take it. I fight panic attacks all day long and thats wearing on me too. I need to see someone, but seeing as I have no money ever, I'm not sure how.

For the next two months or so I will be living in forced poverty so I can try and get back on my feet, but even then the well can only hold so much water before all of the thirsty people have drained it dry. What then?

Late:
Rent
Gas
Electric
Cell phone
Car insurance
Loans from my mom to take care of previous late rent/gas/electric/cell phone/insurance.

I just don't know what to do at all. I feel like an utter failure.